Make adequate preparations before agreeing to seek separation or applying for a divorce or dissolution of civil partnership.
- Seek relationship counseling
Trying salvaging things and see if the relationship can work again. The best thing is that you’ll lose nothing, and if it’s unsuccessful you’ll separate knowing you did your best to save the marriage. It may help your partner get to terms with the termination of the relationship if you’re the one pushing for the separation.
- Speak out
Try and speak about everything – feelings, concerns, and aspirations – together. If you’re ready to talk and listen to each other, you can hold onto a positive relationship even though the romantic part of the relationship is no more.
- Leave your children out of this
If you have children, then ensure they never see or hear you arguing or speaking undesirably to one another. It’s your duty as their parents to ensure they’re aware that your relationship with them will remain incredible in spite of your marriage being on the rocks. So handle everything with your partner and ensure you’re giving your children the best life they have always had.
- Seek legal advice in advance
Ensure you understand the claims both of you have against each other on divorce. Speak to a lawyer who specialises in divorce and family law. That way you’ll ensure that whatever you discuss and agree on with your partner, covers all the necessary issues to avoid agreeing on irrelevant things, resulting to regret in the future.
- Converse about the divorce
Speak about who’ll initiate the divorce process, the facts you bring forward and everything to be mentioned in the divorce papers. In short, have an extensive discussion. Three options are currently available: adultery bad behavior; or, separation for 2 years, depending on whether your partner allows the divorce.
If communicating with one another is difficult, pick someone outside the relationship who can help. Again don’t just pick anyone since some people may make things just worse. Expert meditators can help both of you understand each other’s positions, and see you through the needed negotiations moving forward.
- Exhaust all the options
If meditation is unsuccessful, try having a round table meeting with solicitors of the two sides. This will ensure you’re still part of the process, and as well make sure you receive the relevant support during the negotiations. This method can be used by family lawyers, whether collaboratively or non-collaboratively trained.
- Find help
Parting ways with a partner is tough and can be likened to bereavement. Don’t handle all of it alone, otherwise, you may end up depressed. Speak to friends and family (with an exception of your children) who can help you get through it and calm you down if you’re feeling overwhelmed. In case you can’t speak about personal matters with those close to you or if you need more help seek counseling. Whenever you let out something that hurts a lot you’re actually healing your inner self. So don’t keep quiet.